Days old Christa, being held by her inaSusing and photographed by her Tita
Janice.
Just a month after being wed, I got pregnant. I considered myself lucky as not everyone who wants to have a baby gets pregnant right away. Haji and I were bent to be good parents and anticipated the coming of our bundle of joy.
At 3:00 pm of January 25, 2009, Christa first saw the light. She was born via C-section, weighed 6.10 pounds and measures 50 cm in length. The last day of my stay in the hospital ( before being discharged) was the first time I got to cradle her. The moment she touched my arms, she opened her eyes. Even then, she already had the ability to connect to the person talking to her. She looked at me as I cooed and remarked about her pimpled face. She got my lips while her length she got from her father.
When she was about 4 months old, I noticed something wrong with the movement of her left eye.I raised this concern to other mothers in school which they said was just normal for babies. I was not contented with this, so I started researching through the internet. I learned that it is normal for babies eyes to cross until their 6 month but beyond that, the parents have to bring the baby to a specialist. I waited until she was 5 months old and since I had not seen any improvement, I brought her for consultation with two local eye specialists. Both gave the same diagnosis. Christa has congenital alternating esotropia. The news really broke my heart. Even before this consultation, I had the feeling that she has strabismus. But to hear the condition from the doctors themselves, was really a heart-breaking experience. In her first consultation, I felt all the forces on my knees and my body were dissolved as I listened to what the doctor had to say. For the next 2 weeks, I cried myself to sleep. My heart was crushed each time I look at my beautiful daughter. My whole being was devastated.
After loads of research and the additional fact that the medical facilities needed for her treatment are inadequate here in our place, my husband and I reached a decision to bring Christa to Manila for treatment. We chose Asian Eye Institute. Her PO was/is Dr. Phik Sia Uy. The first step of the treatment was for her to wear eyeglasses and do patching. We had to bring her back after 3 months.
November 2009.After our initial check-up last November 2009, we carried hope in our hearts. It was a struggle to let her wear her glasses but at one point she conceded. This, however, did not last long. She battled against wearing them. No matter how much we forced her to.
December 2009-January 2010.As we waited for her next appointment, her left eye turn became even pronounced. Along with this, I underwent self-regression. I was drowned with much worry. I ate uncontrollably, threw my vanity away, buried my sense of humor and spent majority of my time sulking. I took this trial negatively. I surrounded myself with so much pessimism. I forgot there is SOMEONE bigger to help me with all these.
Feb. 2010.Hadji and I decided to schedule Christa's surgery on her second appointment.We completed all the procedures to have her clearance for surgery. It was really painful for me to see her undergo all the tests, much more the surgery itself. Her energy must had drained to empty as she immediately went to sleep after a long day.
Christa- all ready to hurdle the procedures for her clearance.
After a long day, father and daughter took their much needed rest.
Feb. 16 ,2010 - Surgery Day. Manang Susing and I got out of bed 2 hours before the scheduled surgery. As I look at my daughter in her deep sleep, I silently prayed for her safety. and for the success of her operation. We made the needed preparation for the day.
The moment I set my foot on the 9th floor of the Asian Eye Institute, reality sunk in. My anxiety level started to rise. Effortlessly, my tears streamed their way down on my cheek when I handed her over to her papa so she could change into a scrub suit. I went out of the preparation room and waited on the lounge area. There I waited the longest one hour and thirty minutes in my whole life - each second that passed was an agonizing one. To take my mind off to what my daughter was about to undergo, I did multi-tasking. I watched tv, prayed and read magazine. Needless to say, none of what the host in a tv program said did I comprehend...none of the flipped pages did I see and read.
The surgery went about an hour and thirty minutes but we were discharged 2 more hours after. On the way home, she had regained some of her energy but at times she would just doze off. She was to have her 1st post-op check-up the next day.
We could see the improvement of her eye alignment after the surgery. It took about 3 weeks for the eyes to heal - no more redness and swelling. Unfortunately, we observed her eyes turning in again just 6 weeks after her surgery. So in her follow-up check-up, she was advised to wear bifocals. Her eyes are aligned when she looks from afar but crosses when see things near. We had this glass made ( at a whooping cost) but she did not wear it.
Due to Christa's refusal to wear her glass coupled with my urge to ask for more opinions, I took it upon myself to refer her case to another PO whose name was reputable. The advise she gave was to upgrade Christa's prescription and for her to continue her patching.
As of today, Christa refuses to do any of the treatment advised by the doctors no matter how much we force her to. We patch her eyes when there is a chance. Her eyes may not be perfect but are better compared to how they were before. I know she'll be facing more surgeries in time but for now I am thankful of her present condition. We will make it a point that her eyes will be closely monitored. When she is old enough to comprehend things, I need not force her anymore to follow the treatment given to her. But for now, I have to deal her battling against her treatment with this motto- " I'd rather, you hate me now and thank me later."
This is me now...
At 3:00 pm of January 25, 2009, Christa first saw the light. She was born via C-section, weighed 6.10 pounds and measures 50 cm in length. The last day of my stay in the hospital ( before being discharged) was the first time I got to cradle her. The moment she touched my arms, she opened her eyes. Even then, she already had the ability to connect to the person talking to her. She looked at me as I cooed and remarked about her pimpled face. She got my lips while her length she got from her father.
When she was about 4 months old, I noticed something wrong with the movement of her left eye.I raised this concern to other mothers in school which they said was just normal for babies. I was not contented with this, so I started researching through the internet. I learned that it is normal for babies eyes to cross until their 6 month but beyond that, the parents have to bring the baby to a specialist. I waited until she was 5 months old and since I had not seen any improvement, I brought her for consultation with two local eye specialists. Both gave the same diagnosis. Christa has congenital alternating esotropia. The news really broke my heart. Even before this consultation, I had the feeling that she has strabismus. But to hear the condition from the doctors themselves, was really a heart-breaking experience. In her first consultation, I felt all the forces on my knees and my body were dissolved as I listened to what the doctor had to say. For the next 2 weeks, I cried myself to sleep. My heart was crushed each time I look at my beautiful daughter. My whole being was devastated.
After loads of research and the additional fact that the medical facilities needed for her treatment are inadequate here in our place, my husband and I reached a decision to bring Christa to Manila for treatment. We chose Asian Eye Institute. Her PO was/is Dr. Phik Sia Uy. The first step of the treatment was for her to wear eyeglasses and do patching. We had to bring her back after 3 months.
November 2009.After our initial check-up last November 2009, we carried hope in our hearts. It was a struggle to let her wear her glasses but at one point she conceded. This, however, did not last long. She battled against wearing them. No matter how much we forced her to.
December 2009-January 2010.As we waited for her next appointment, her left eye turn became even pronounced. Along with this, I underwent self-regression. I was drowned with much worry. I ate uncontrollably, threw my vanity away, buried my sense of humor and spent majority of my time sulking. I took this trial negatively. I surrounded myself with so much pessimism. I forgot there is SOMEONE bigger to help me with all these.
Feb. 2010.Hadji and I decided to schedule Christa's surgery on her second appointment.We completed all the procedures to have her clearance for surgery. It was really painful for me to see her undergo all the tests, much more the surgery itself. Her energy must had drained to empty as she immediately went to sleep after a long day.
Christa- all ready to hurdle the procedures for her clearance.
After a long day, father and daughter took their much needed rest.
Feb. 16 ,2010 - Surgery Day. Manang Susing and I got out of bed 2 hours before the scheduled surgery. As I look at my daughter in her deep sleep, I silently prayed for her safety. and for the success of her operation. We made the needed preparation for the day.
The moment I set my foot on the 9th floor of the Asian Eye Institute, reality sunk in. My anxiety level started to rise. Effortlessly, my tears streamed their way down on my cheek when I handed her over to her papa so she could change into a scrub suit. I went out of the preparation room and waited on the lounge area. There I waited the longest one hour and thirty minutes in my whole life - each second that passed was an agonizing one. To take my mind off to what my daughter was about to undergo, I did multi-tasking. I watched tv, prayed and read magazine. Needless to say, none of what the host in a tv program said did I comprehend...none of the flipped pages did I see and read.
The surgery went about an hour and thirty minutes but we were discharged 2 more hours after. On the way home, she had regained some of her energy but at times she would just doze off. She was to have her 1st post-op check-up the next day.
We could see the improvement of her eye alignment after the surgery. It took about 3 weeks for the eyes to heal - no more redness and swelling. Unfortunately, we observed her eyes turning in again just 6 weeks after her surgery. So in her follow-up check-up, she was advised to wear bifocals. Her eyes are aligned when she looks from afar but crosses when see things near. We had this glass made ( at a whooping cost) but she did not wear it.
Due to Christa's refusal to wear her glass coupled with my urge to ask for more opinions, I took it upon myself to refer her case to another PO whose name was reputable. The advise she gave was to upgrade Christa's prescription and for her to continue her patching.
As of today, Christa refuses to do any of the treatment advised by the doctors no matter how much we force her to. We patch her eyes when there is a chance. Her eyes may not be perfect but are better compared to how they were before. I know she'll be facing more surgeries in time but for now I am thankful of her present condition. We will make it a point that her eyes will be closely monitored. When she is old enough to comprehend things, I need not force her anymore to follow the treatment given to her. But for now, I have to deal her battling against her treatment with this motto- " I'd rather, you hate me now and thank me later."
This is me now...
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